Jennifer Aniston - Finding Happiness By Facing Her Anger
by Sukh Singh, Associate Partner, Lighthouse International
Whether it’s Kurt Cobain, David Bowie or Will Smith, any legend can show us that no matter what external success we may achieve, real success starts with ourselves. Whether we achieve great wealth, distinguished levels of achievement or a luxurious lifestyle, if we don’t face up to our personal challenges; our limiting beliefs, our fears, our prejudices etc - then we can never be truly happy and successful. Indeed, if we don’t address those matters we can find life to be a very tough and a never-ending rollercoaster.
In a recent interview with the Hollywood Reporter magazine, Jennifer Aniston shared how she’s only recently been learning to deal with an anger issue that’s plagued her throughout her life...
"I always thought, if you're angry you just don't say anything," she says. "Things would come out passively. But it doesn't have to be black or white. You don't have to be a hysterical human being and have veins popping out of your neck and turn bright red and terrify people — or else keep quiet and put your head in the sand. I used to loathe confrontation. Loathe it. It was absolute. I understood anger, but I didn't know that you should express it. Which has been something that I've really tried to work on."
She has another weakness that she is addressing;
"I'm a control freak" she admits. "I like to be in charge of everything. My life was so out of control growing up, it's very important today for it to be in control. "Even now, she says, "I have to bite my tongue sometimes if I'm on a movie, when I think I can figure out how to make this problem that they're having go smoothly.”
Being Honest and Changing the Script
There are two things Ms. Aniston shares here that are incredibly powerful…
"I always thought, if you're angry you just don't say anything,"
“My life was so out of control growing up, it's very important today for it to be in control."
Jennifer Aniston grew up with certain beliefs and ideas that never changed until she took an important step to be more honest with herself. She sought out help and guidance to find out what was really going on, in order to change it. She’s also started meditating to clear her head. That dedication to self-honesty, to reality is a cornerstone of every truly successful person.
Think about it, can you really succeed in anything if you’re lying to yourself or running away from the truth? Can you be happy if you’re not addressing your own anger? Can you earn £100,000 if you ignore the fact you procrastinate? Can you make friends if you’re not being a friend to yourself?
Sure, we all have our moments, but the more we can learn to face up to our own challenges and get the guidance we need from a mentor, coach, or even through writing a journal, the more we can live happier; more successful and abundant lives.
Learning From Legends...
Jennifer Aniston photo courtesy of Diariocritico de Venezuela @ Flickr